What if one day, after a long relationship which has become the purpose of your life, your identity and happiness, shit-load of crap explodes on you and you are faced with the truth that your partner was cheating on you? This situation puts you in a rock and hard place and the pain that you have to deal with is the truth. This boyfriend who has expressed his undying love for you was actually expressing the same thing to another girl.
Destructive thoughts may enter your mind... Haste decisions made...retaliation is in order...and stopping for awhile to evaluate the situation is really difficult.
Would you end the relationship abruptly? Would it end his cheating?
It may take a while for reality to sink in. You would have to deal with the hurt first. Crying would help. Talking to friends helps too. But in the midst of it all, you should consider dealing with your cheating boyfriend rather than walk away from the situation without making him realize his mistake. So how do you deal with a c heating boyfriend as well as the emotional upheaval?
Self-doubt or Self-pity
Remember that your boyfriend is the one who has cheated on you and not the other way round. There should be absolutely no room for self-doubt or self-pity. "Was there anything wrong with the way I dressed or looked? Is this the reason why allowed himself to get attracted to another girl?" Self-doubt or self-pity can hamper your self-esteem and hinder you from thinking straight. The guilt and pain after being cheated by your boyfriend is no doubt intense, but wallowing will not improve the situation.
Accept reality but avoid hasty decisions
Getting cheated is undoubtedly a heart-wrenching aspect for a girl but it cannot be viewed as a factor to end a relationship. Repeated episodes of cheating by your boyfriend, inspite of warnings, is unpardonable. But if you have known your boyfriend for long and think he is a wonderful person, then you may reconsider the idea of abruptly ending the relationship. But make sure that he makes a solemn promise to remain faithful towards you.
Confrontation
Once you have discovered that your boyfriend is cheating on you, don’t keep your negative emotions bottled up within you. Confront your boyfriend with your findings. You do need to have a heart-to-heart talk with him to find out what is on his mind, how he views his relationship with you or what both of you can do together to ensure that this does not happen again.
Give an ultimatum to your boyfriend
You can issue an ultimatum, asking him to 'either end the relationship with the other girl' or run the risk of losing you forever. If your boyfriend agrees for the former, then mutually agree upon a plan of action. If your boyfriend is unfaithful again, then you are free to do whatever you want.
Seek professional advice
If you are unable to reach a consensus with your boyfriend, meet a counselor and try to get some guidance in dealing with the situation. Professional help in such a situation may tie up lose ends and help you in dealing with a cheating boyfriend with much needed maturity and discretion.
